We’re about halfway through the semester, the weather is cold, we’re deep in midterms, we’re starting our final seminar papers, life is pretty hard. The depression sets in. The second wave of imposter syndrome has kicked in. We’re not sure we’re doing the right thing, and even if we are, getting a faculty job is harder than winning the lottery. How do we get through this?
I’m starting my #selfcare journey by blowing off my reaction paper to do a face mask and exfoliation while watching Hallmark movies. I know that this class provides me with the basic foundational theory of my chosen field, but it’s really hard and reading a lot makes me overwhelmed! I need to get some essential oils and rub them over me while i lay in the dark and read instagram. Don’t judge! #selfcare!
The book reviews I was assigned are overdue, and when the editor asked for them, I got so overwhelmed that I had to book a ticket to a weekend in New Orleans and take pictures of expensive food and insta stories of me dancing to jazz. On the plane back I threatened someone in first class until they switched seats with me. They complained but I didn’t feel like they heard my #selfcare needs.
In class on Monday the prof asked us a question about the readings and I got so overwhelmed I grabbed my phone and wrote a message to everyone I met telling them I don’t have time to communicate with any of them so if they contacting me I would be taking ME TIME so fuck off. Then, the professor assigned reading for the next week and I had to run out of the room directly to T.J. Maxx and buy $3000 worth of home goods because I needed to concentrate on my OWN CARE before I could help anyone else.
Can you believe my job expects me to show up for shifts during this stressful time! I’m a student first. Oh wait, I’m a HUMAN first. And the PERSON in me needs to be taken care of by me. As in the self. Can you believe my boss called me to ask where I was? I had to tell her that I was taking time for ME and I had to hang up the phone because I was in line at Starbucks ordering a triple mocha cookie dough caramel frap because I needed #selfcare.
Scams! Scams! Scams!
Look at these graduate student scams! They are selling information that your school should be teaching you!
Just for fun!
Who said it?
“I’m addressing a subject about which I know nothing whatsoever, except for the fact that it does not exist.”
-Frederic Jameson, postmodern scholar and author of “Cognitive Mapping” or the dude in your grad school seminar who definitely didn’t do the reading
What is this? A semi-regular newsletter about life in graduate school. Do you like it? Great. Please share it widely.
All content reflects my individual views and is not associated with any university, department, faculty, or students. Names and situations mentioned have been changed.